Not So Deep Thoughts

With November in the rear view and December typically flying by, I figured I’d toss out my list of resolutions for the New Year a little early this year. I’m hoping if I establish the resolutions early I’ll have a better chance of actually sticking to them and making them a reality.

First off, I vow to stop procrastinating. No more putting off til the last minute what I can get done today. Looks like I’m off to a good start with that one with a resolution list on Dec. 1. Check.

I also vow to never again make a bet based on who my heart tells me to pick. After getting burned time and time again by picking my favorite instead of the “favorite,” I’m going to try and take the best team regardless and see if that saves me a few dollars. Took Carolina over my beloved Packers yesterday and an ill-timed jump from Charles Woodson helped make me a winner and a loser at one time. Check.

I also vow to never again bring my gun with me when I go out to the
club. While it does make me feel safer than the three bodyguards I
typically roll with, it’s a bitch getting it by security at the front
door, it weighs me down when I’m trying to get my groove on, and I’m
tired of trying to explain to the ladies I’m slow dancing with that I’m
not that excited to see them and I do actually have a gun in my pocket.
Not to mention the city wants me to keep getting it registered every
year and sometimes I forget to put the safety on and we all know what
can happen when you forget to do that. I also vow to root for a Plaxico-less Giants team and booh that glock-touting idiot every time I see him.

I vow to never again watch a matchup on TNT or ESPN until they start mixing up the teams being featured. I’m well aware that the Lakers, Celtics, Suns, Spurs and Rockets are good teams with stars that help drive ratings but enough already. Last time I checked, there were 30 teams in the league so let’s mix it up a little. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not holding my breath for a Grizzlies-Clippers, T-Wolves-Wizards doubleheader, but if I turn on TNT and see Ernie Johnson, Kenny “The Jet” Smith and the Chuckwagon previewing yet another Lakers vs. anybody matchup, I’m going to go ballistic.

Speaking of the NBA, I also vow to never again make the argument that Allen Iverson is “more mature” now and thus, ready to finaly get the championship ring he deserves. I’ve been a huge fan of AI’s since his Georgetown days and while I will still argue that he’s the best under 6-foot player the league has ever seen, I’m not sure he’ll ever truly “get it.” I truly believed that upon his arrirval to Detroit, he would welcome a lesser role in the offense, find his niche on the veteran-laiden team and simply blend in with the others. After getting pissed about his coach’s decision to have practice on Thanksgiving, Iverson voiced his concerns about the holiday session by skipping it altogether. After his history of practice-related conflicts you’d think AI would do whatever it takes to put those conflicts behind him but his actions prove he still doesn’t get it and probably never will.  

And while my actual list of resolutions is as long as the list of teams that qualify for the NHL playoffs, I’ll save the rest for another day. Now, get working on your own, we can all find something we need to work on. I would suggest showering more often. I’m not going to get into who should jump on that one, you know who you are.

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